Hello everyone!
So, I want to to start this post by saying that when people ask me “what is your blog about?” I always respond that it’s about my life, and it’s true. Different from other bloggers, I don’t have a fashion, beauty, or health focus–I like to talk about everything and anything I care about in life. This can be anywhere from fashion, health, mom tips, feelings I’m experiencing, or recommendations I have. The concept behind every post is that it’s something I would talk to my friends over dinner about. It just so happens that I also like to share those things with the world! (haha). In the beginning it was hard, but now, it’s super fun and sometimes therapeutic!
With that being said, today I am writing about something that I have experienced for the first time in my life and that I have been thinking a lot about for the past months: mom guilt. Before I had Diego, I would hear women talking about this and would secretly roll my eyes! (haha). I would think, “How hard is it to have a baby and just keep living the same life?”
Welllll, it’s super rewarding but also super hard! Especially for us working moms.
Before having Diego, I rarely felt guilty about something. If I did, it was if I had too much dessert at dinner or I didn’t make it to the gym enough times in a week hahaha. However, since having him,I feel guilty about a MILLION things!
“Did I not spend enough time with him today?”
“Did I breastfeed for long enough?”
“Is it my fault that he got sick after going to a birthday party?”
“If I go on a quick business trip will I miss something? Baby life is full of firsts!”
“Should I work less hours?”
The list is endless!!! And today, I have decided to stop! I have been working on this for the past few months. I’ve been working on accepting and being grateful for the imperfect situations in life and not being as hard on myself. I have come to the conclusion that these feelings are normal and that I have them because I care! I love my son and I want to be the best mom and wife.
Here are some things that have helped me deal with mom guilt:
- When I am with Diego, I am just focused on him. The time I spend with him is just for him–no phone, no distractions, just us as a family. I’ve found that this makes us feel way happier, and the time we spend is all about quality over quantity.
- I have accepted who I am without judging myself. I am a woman who loves to work and chase after her dreams, because it makes me happy. So, I will continue to work and develop while being the best mom I can be.
- I try to work on balance and schedule everything, so I can make the most out of the time I have. So far, it has worked and helped me to achieve a better work/life balance. I schedule EVERYTHING on my calendar, that way I make the most out of my workday and my time with my family.
- I understand that every family and mom is different. There is abolutely no point in comparing yourself to other moms! What works for others might now work for you. I used to compare a lot! However, now I just focus on what works for me and my family and I am fully accepting and non-judgmental toward what works for others.
- Always try to focus on the positive! Focus on how good of a mom you are. Negative feelings and thoughts tend to overpower the positive, so make it a habit and train yourself to focus on the positive!
For all of you guys out there that are on the same mom guilt boat I am, I hope this was helpful! If you have any other tips or experiences I would love to hear them in the comments below!
Thanks so much for stopping by, and I’ll see you in my next post!
P.S. On this post I am wearing my favorite top from Prose and Poetry (I have added some of favorite items from this brand to the carousel below), white Pumps from Nicholas Kirkwood, and my favorite Rag and Bone jeans!
Lorena, I totally understand what you are feeling and let me tell you something. I’m a stay-at-home mom. I worry every single day. Did they eat enough? Should I be teaching them more things? Should they be potty trained already? And million more things lol I’m glad you decided to write this post because it reminds me too that I need to focus on the positive and give myself more credit. Thank you!